Fantasy Smoke Break: Frank the Tank
Tuesday, October 6, 2009 Today I would like to take a fantasy smoke break with someone who I feel would understand me. When I quit smoking the hardest part is always not having that little break during the day to hang out. Its so hard to just sit at your desk and watch them walk by, knowing all the while you will be missing a hilarious story, a in depth discussion about a new tv show, or some great office gossip~oh and there is that whole hit of nicotine thing. Talk about torture.
The best smoke break friends understand you. There is no judgement on a smoke break between smokers. Its hard to judge a person who is sitting out in the 2 degree weather sucking on a cancer stick with you. Thats not to say that there is no judgement at all....um yeah, it scares me to think about what they say about me now that...., I'm not even going to begin to imagine. I admit I'm not always the best smoke break conversationalist, I talk to much, forget about the time constraints, always go for the cheap laugh. I'm guessing I'm not missed.
Oh well lets not board the paranoia train today.
Instead lets take an imaginary smoke break with a national treasure: Frank The Tank.
My party animal days came a lot later than the average person. This is due to the fact that I had 3 kids by the time I was 25, so my entire twenties were spent wading through baby shit and praying for a miracle. Anyway the miracle came in the form of a divorce, and then OMIGOD all the sudden I had every other weekend OFF. AN ENTIRE TWO DAYS, TO MYSELF. ONLY ONE ASS TO WIPE. Unless you've been through it, there is NO way you can possibly understand the feeling of pleasure and release, and the subsequent chaos that ensued.
Think about the movie Shaw Shank Redemption crossed with Coyote Ugly, and that will give you an accurate portrayal of my twenties.
Frank is the same way. He is just inhibited by his wife's desire to change him into a respectable man, when deep down inside he is a party animal.
I would discuss this with him on a smoke break. Then we would totally do keg stands and go streaking.
Reader Comments (1)
Would you discuss your uncanny skills on the flip cup table??